07-21-2017, 05:07 AM
Hi Cmdline,
I read your post this morning and wanted to respond, but on less than 60 minutes of sleep last night, I was not sure that I could form a coherent sentence, let alone reply. I'm not sure that this will be any better, but I've had so much caffeine today that I thought I would try.
First of all, my heart goes out to you. Tapering, titrating, whatever, anytime you have to lower your dosage for whatever reason it sucks! I completely understand what you are going through and how you are feeling. You probably feel sick, tired, not like yourself and even the littlest task seems like it takes too much to even try to do. I don't know if you suffer from depression, too, but if you do, you have probably found yourself staying in bed or on the sofa for as long as you can, whenever you can and avoiding people and the things that you use to enjoy doing.
I don't have a lot of experience with Valium, because like Xanax and Temazepam, it never really worked for me. As part of the Ashton taper, you get to a certain point and they swap the Clonazepam for Valium, and not only did it not work, I experienced my first seizure and was hospitalized. From that point on, it was a straight C'pam taper.
So, after my miserable 11 months with panic attacks, insomnia and all the other crap I went through, I found a doctor who did not know just how bad my C'pam addiction had been. At first she tried Lorazepam, which stopped the panic attacks, but did nothing for the insomnia. Eventually, she prescribed Clonazepam 1-3mgs a day as needed. As with any Benzo that you have been on before, most people know that the old dosage is not enough. She agreed to increase it to 3-6mgs/day as needed, and because I was doing a lot of international travel at the time and getting a monthly refills didn't always fit into my schedule, she agreed to prescribe 3 months worth with each refill (580 pills)! I was feeling pretty good in those days, until the State that I live in decided to start tracking prescriptions for Benzos, Opiates, and other commonly abused drugs. At that point, I had to go back to 1-3mgs/day with 90 pills a month. She has been trying to get me off of that for over a year. Little does she know that I am currently taking a much higher dosage than prescribed. So, I get it. Once you are on Benzos, you are pretty much on them for life.
Ok, so how do I manage this? Obviously, I can't take 8-10/mg a day and work, so I am very lucky that I live in a state where marijuana is legal. At first I got a medical card for insomnia and migraines, and then recreational use made it easier to get. Now, I am not advising you to do this, but for me, I am able to go for about 10-14 days on 2-3/mg at night, along with a piece of an edible cookie or tincture drops in OJ. After that time period, my anxiety is back and so is my insomnia. I have also heard that it can cause paranoia, so it's not a perm solution, just a way for me to manage my health issues.
So, that's my story. Now, my questions for you. Is there a reason you are titrating now? Is it a case of your Dr. just saying it's time? Is he/she a GP or a psychiatrist? Is the doctor offering another solution/medication? One of the things my doctor has tried to get me to do is go to a psychiatrist, which takes the liability off of her and puts it on another doctor. Nice, eh? There are also doctors with a lot of degrees known as NeuropsychoPharmacologists. They are hard to find and I missed my opportunity to see a highly respected one who practices in NYC, but use to see patients where I live once a month. I am currently on a waiting list to see him at his office in NY, but if you can find a doctor with that kind of knowledge it might just help. You need to find a good one though.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I have been through what you are going through, and although I don't have the answers, I am here to talk if you ever want to. Hang tough, be strong and keep the faith. This, too, shall pass, or so I keep telling myself.
I read your post this morning and wanted to respond, but on less than 60 minutes of sleep last night, I was not sure that I could form a coherent sentence, let alone reply. I'm not sure that this will be any better, but I've had so much caffeine today that I thought I would try.
First of all, my heart goes out to you. Tapering, titrating, whatever, anytime you have to lower your dosage for whatever reason it sucks! I completely understand what you are going through and how you are feeling. You probably feel sick, tired, not like yourself and even the littlest task seems like it takes too much to even try to do. I don't know if you suffer from depression, too, but if you do, you have probably found yourself staying in bed or on the sofa for as long as you can, whenever you can and avoiding people and the things that you use to enjoy doing.
I don't have a lot of experience with Valium, because like Xanax and Temazepam, it never really worked for me. As part of the Ashton taper, you get to a certain point and they swap the Clonazepam for Valium, and not only did it not work, I experienced my first seizure and was hospitalized. From that point on, it was a straight C'pam taper.
So, after my miserable 11 months with panic attacks, insomnia and all the other crap I went through, I found a doctor who did not know just how bad my C'pam addiction had been. At first she tried Lorazepam, which stopped the panic attacks, but did nothing for the insomnia. Eventually, she prescribed Clonazepam 1-3mgs a day as needed. As with any Benzo that you have been on before, most people know that the old dosage is not enough. She agreed to increase it to 3-6mgs/day as needed, and because I was doing a lot of international travel at the time and getting a monthly refills didn't always fit into my schedule, she agreed to prescribe 3 months worth with each refill (580 pills)! I was feeling pretty good in those days, until the State that I live in decided to start tracking prescriptions for Benzos, Opiates, and other commonly abused drugs. At that point, I had to go back to 1-3mgs/day with 90 pills a month. She has been trying to get me off of that for over a year. Little does she know that I am currently taking a much higher dosage than prescribed. So, I get it. Once you are on Benzos, you are pretty much on them for life.
Ok, so how do I manage this? Obviously, I can't take 8-10/mg a day and work, so I am very lucky that I live in a state where marijuana is legal. At first I got a medical card for insomnia and migraines, and then recreational use made it easier to get. Now, I am not advising you to do this, but for me, I am able to go for about 10-14 days on 2-3/mg at night, along with a piece of an edible cookie or tincture drops in OJ. After that time period, my anxiety is back and so is my insomnia. I have also heard that it can cause paranoia, so it's not a perm solution, just a way for me to manage my health issues.
So, that's my story. Now, my questions for you. Is there a reason you are titrating now? Is it a case of your Dr. just saying it's time? Is he/she a GP or a psychiatrist? Is the doctor offering another solution/medication? One of the things my doctor has tried to get me to do is go to a psychiatrist, which takes the liability off of her and puts it on another doctor. Nice, eh? There are also doctors with a lot of degrees known as NeuropsychoPharmacologists. They are hard to find and I missed my opportunity to see a highly respected one who practices in NYC, but use to see patients where I live once a month. I am currently on a waiting list to see him at his office in NY, but if you can find a doctor with that kind of knowledge it might just help. You need to find a good one though.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I have been through what you are going through, and although I don't have the answers, I am here to talk if you ever want to. Hang tough, be strong and keep the faith. This, too, shall pass, or so I keep telling myself.