02-29-2016, 02:48 PM
No, it's not to personal. I guess I am trying after all these years to forgive him. It's tough though, I know he is living a happy pain free life. I blame myself for getting in a car with a guy who was narcissistic and spoiled.I knew better but at the time my friends ( who I don't blam) pushed me to get back into the dating seen after I was in an abusive relationship before. I know I was young, in high school, but I can't not think k of where I'd be today if it never happened.
I also know, not to live in the past , but when you have to relive that day for so long ; it's tough.
The other thing is , I went to College and graduated at the top of my class in 09' in the medical profession. I redid my high school 2x to be sure that I would be able to keep up. Bease I have permanent damage to my frontal lobe, my memory highly effected my studies and how Har I had to work. So, I was elated that I'd come so far. Ends up after doing my internship at the hospital, they gave me rave reviews. The kicker... I went to apply for a job at the hospital where I was at and they first said they had a job for me... yaaa , you would think. No, they must have done some digging, (illegal ) and found out that I was on painkillers . So, no job and I worked my butt off for 5 years for nothing....
This story goes on, but I won't bore you. Thanks for the response and making it easier to let out some, only some, stuff I've held in for awhile.
Thanks Fire, your a good person . It's a new day. Cold as hell (hope I can use that word) but I will keep having a positive attitude and get the best out of what I can.
Always,
J.
I also know, not to live in the past , but when you have to relive that day for so long ; it's tough.
The other thing is , I went to College and graduated at the top of my class in 09' in the medical profession. I redid my high school 2x to be sure that I would be able to keep up. Bease I have permanent damage to my frontal lobe, my memory highly effected my studies and how Har I had to work. So, I was elated that I'd come so far. Ends up after doing my internship at the hospital, they gave me rave reviews. The kicker... I went to apply for a job at the hospital where I was at and they first said they had a job for me... yaaa , you would think. No, they must have done some digging, (illegal ) and found out that I was on painkillers . So, no job and I worked my butt off for 5 years for nothing....
This story goes on, but I won't bore you. Thanks for the response and making it easier to let out some, only some, stuff I've held in for awhile.
Thanks Fire, your a good person . It's a new day. Cold as hell (hope I can use that word) but I will keep having a positive attitude and get the best out of what I can.
Always,
J.