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Humorous Smilies - Printable Version

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RE: Humorous Smilies - Sudsy - 12-17-2015

I am glad I found this thread today I needed a laugh and man did I get one.
Thanks

RE: Humorous Smilies - Popster - 12-17-2015

you got it wrong.....Ice is the buck sneaking some snacks.

RE: Humorous Smilies - IceWizard - 12-18-2015

Popster... They were tasty too!!

[Image: x4GkA7v.jpg]


Forgive Me... Please?

A man walks into a church confessional and
says to the priest, "Bless me, father, for I
have sinned. I was with seven different hot
women last night."

The priest is silent for a moment, then says,
"Go home and cut seven lemons in half,
squeeze the juice into a glass and drink it
down in one gulp."

"And Ill be forgiven?" asks the man.

"No," replies the priest, "But it will wipe that
silly smirk off your face!"



[Image: bgbIBgr.jpg]
Politicaly Incorrect

A fat girl served me in McDonald's at
lunchtime. She said "Sorry about the wait".

I said, "Don't worry, darling, you'll find a way
to lose it eventually."


I walked past a homeless kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the bank. When I came out, he looked at me and said, "Any change?"

I said, "Nope, you're still homeless."


Snow in the forecast and the TV weather girl said she was expecting 8 inches tonight.
I thought to myself, 'fat chance', with a face
like that!


Years ago it was suggested that an apple a
day kept the doctor away.
But since nearly all of the doctors are now
Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich
works best!


I hate all this terrorist business.
I used to love the days when you could look at
an unattended bag on a train or bus and
think to yourself, "I'm going to take that."


A man in a hot air balloon is lost over some
forest and then an open field.
He looks down and sees a farmer in the field and shouts to him, "Where am I?"

The farmer looks back up and shouts back, "You're in a basket, you dumb idiot!"


I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a
local bar until the last question which I got
wrong.
The question was where do women have
the curliest hair?

Fiji was the correct answer...

Hell, how did I know they wanted the name
of a country?


I'd just come out of the shop with a roastbeef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn and a jumbo sausage.
A poor homeless man sat there and said,
"I've not eaten for two days."

I told him, "I wish I had your will power."



In the end,
I've learned one thing, that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pi$$ing everyone off is a
piece of cake.

RE: Humorous Smilies - Charon - 12-18-2015

they may be politically incorrect, but quite a few were funny. thanks, Ice.

RE: Humorous Smilies - IceWizard - 12-18-2015

MERRY CHRISTMAS
[Image: xmas-sleigh4.gif]


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[Image: funny-pic-christmas-high-hopes.jpg]


[Image: funny-pic-christmas-santas-gone.jpg]
[Image: funny-pic-christmas-cat-dog.jpg]


[Image: funny-animation-xmas-santas-butt.gif]


[Image: funny-pic-christmas-drinks.jpg]


[Image: funny-pic-christmas-egg-nog.jpg]


[Image: funny-pic-christmas-rudolf.jpg]


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[Image: xmas-animated-frosty-in-the-hot-tub.gif]

Now for all the ladies... I've decided to post a "Christmas Pic" of myself for your holiday enjoyment....



[Image: xmas-anni-man.gif]

HAVE A VERY
MERRY CHRISTMAS
[Image: animated-xmas-father-x_reinder.gif]

RE: Humorous Smilies - willie33 - 12-19-2015

[Image: the-road-to-success.jpg]

I've got you, bro.......maybe?

[Image: lions-climbing-a-tree.jpg]

The family chilling.......

[Image: kid-and-dog-on-sofa.jpg]

[Image: when-you-start-paying-your-own-power-bill.jpg]

[Image: thirsty-bus.jpg]

Good thing he wore underpants.......

[Image: pulls-down-news-reporters-pants.gif]

[Image: dog-with-pizza.jpg]

[Image: first-time-parent-pug.jpg]

[Image: bears-wiz-in-the-woods.jpg]

RE: Humorous Smilies - Charon - 12-19-2015

nice, willie. cute cute cute.

RE: Humorous Smilies - Popster - 12-19-2015

yoga VS alcohol

   

   

   

   

[attachment=852]

   

   

   

RE: Humorous Smilies - Linville - 12-19-2015

Tongue ha hah very funny......  Tongue 


=====

I liked this one real well.....  Big Grin 

[Image: tumblr_mfawtw3Oqs1qkbo6bo1_500.gif]

RE: Humorous Smilies - Popster - 12-19-2015

let's see, do I want dogs or children?