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The therapeutic effect of crying
#11
Thanks for your comments Blockhead59!  In my experience, American men are certainly afraid to own up to crying, when there isn't really anything that they should have to own up to. It shouldn't be something to be ashamed of. Such a shame that it is seen as a sign of weakness. I am a guy and the type that most people wouldn't think of as a crier. I am ex-military, 6'4" 240lb lifelong bodybuilder (until I recently fell ill) and covered with tattoos. When I would share with others that I engaged in therapeutic crying and they would look at me like they were waiting for the punch line..lol.
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#12
(12-30-2017, 08:50 AM)Rafterman Wrote: Thanks for your comments Blockhead59!  In my experience, American men are certainly afraid to own up to crying, when there isn't really anything that they should have to own up to. It shouldn't be something to be ashamed of. Such a shame that it is seen as a sign of weakness. I am a guy and the type that most people wouldn't think of as a crier. I am ex-military, 6'4" 240lb lifelong bodybuilder (until I recently fell ill) and covered with tattoos. When I would share with others that I engaged in therapeutic crying and they would look at me like they were waiting for the punch line..lol.

No worries, RM! Glad u found it helpful. I think it's funny (not ha ha funny, but some of that, too)  that men can cry at sports events or even sports movies, but crying for emotional reasons has been perceived as not masculine. I agree with you that on that. I really hope that people begin to accept therapeutic crying as a beneficial supplemental treatment in helping people. No punch line...lol.
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#13
(12-31-2017, 04:26 AM)Blockhead59 Wrote:
(12-30-2017, 08:50 AM)Rafterman Wrote: Thanks for your comments Blockhead59!  In my experience, American men are certainly afraid to own up to crying, when there isn't really anything that they should have to own up to. It shouldn't be something to be ashamed of. Such a shame that it is seen as a sign of weakness. I am a guy and the type that most people wouldn't think of as a crier. I am ex-military, 6'4" 240lb lifelong bodybuilder (until I recently fell ill) and covered with tattoos. When I would share with others that I engaged in therapeutic crying and they would look at me like they were waiting for the punch line..lol.

No worries, RM! Glad u found it helpful. I think it's funny (not ha ha funny, but some of that, too)  that men can cry at sports events or even sports movies, but crying for emotional reasons has been perceived as not masculine. I agree with you that on that. I really hope that people begin to accept therapeutic crying as a beneficial supplemental treatment in helping people. No punch line...lol.

Thanks BH. For what its worth, the men is Europe do have a lower suicide rate than in the US. I am not saying that is because they engage in therapeutic crying, but maybe it is one small piece of the puzzle. I like the rat race and the hustle and bustle of the US. Born in Brooklyn and lived for nearly 50 years in North Jersey (before escaping to the south..lol) so I am geared for the faster pace. But who knows if that has contributed to my depression. They take it slower in Europe and also are not afraid to show emotion. That has to help where depression is concerned. Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't live anywhere but the US of A, but just sayin'.  Regards, RM
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#14
Sure, RM. Yeah, and you have to keep us posted on the effects of the practice. How'd you get into this method of dealing with depression? I've been depressed my whole life, until I got on meds. Also, do not get me started on NJ-we are from the same tribe lol. Same trajectory it seems, too. Happy New Year!
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#15
(12-31-2017, 07:07 PM)Blockhead59 Wrote: Sure, RM. Yeah, and you have to keep us posted on the effects of the practice. How'd you get into this method of dealing with depression? I've been depressed my whole life, until I got on meds. Also, do not get me started on NJ-we are from the same tribe lol. Same trajectory it seems, too.  Happy New Year!

So you are originally from Jersey, the attitude capital of America? I knew I liked your style. I worked as a psychotherapist for a large group in Manhattan. We would use different modalities to try to address a whole laundry list of different emotional problems seen in clients. The modalities that we used were dictated to us by the owners of the practice (two longtime Psychiatrist's from the region). I was skeptical when they first told us that were to suggest controlled crying in some select cases, but the results were very positive. This was a good 20 years ago. After seeing it work so well for clients, I started doing it. I would cry until I was completely spent. The resulting feeling reminded me of how you feel after a hard workout at the gym. I felt exhausted, but good. Like I could feel relief, I could feel the endorphin rush. I felt like something good had just happened. I wish more people would give it a shot. Thanks for your comments. We definitely have to talk more about NJ in the future, now that I know we have chewed some of the same dirt.  Have yourself a great Eve.  RM
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#16
Rafterman it seems as though this has been a serious study for you. I have never given crying much thought in greater detail before reading your posts and the benefits that come with the practice of crying. I find my self more able to cry from a moving film which touches a part of the soul. These are more tears of happiness or emotional connection to the film I would be watching. I would see this as working in the same way but with less of self-induced sadness.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and approach to something which I have viewed normally as an area I don't wish to visit emotionally. But as humans, this is a necessity which maybe I should embrace more. Even with moving films which fills me with emotions I tend to hold the tears back. I will certainly be looking to let them flow and encourage them more.
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#17
(01-06-2018, 06:50 PM)slipmat Wrote: Rafterman it seems as though this has been a serious study for you. I have never given crying much thought in greater detail before reading your posts and the benefits that come with the practice of crying. I find my self more able to cry from a moving film which touches a part of the soul. These are more tears of happiness or emotional connection to the film I would be watching. I would see this as working in the same way but with less of self-induced sadness.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and approach to something which I have viewed normally as an area I don't wish to visit emotionally. But as humans, this is a necessity which maybe I should embrace more. Even with moving films which fills me with emotions I tend to hold the tears back. I will certainly be looking to let them flow and encourage them more.

So great to hear it, Slip. Thank you. I wish that I developed crying for joyous or touching reasons in my original post. I don't know why I was so focused on crying due to sadness. As I though more about it, I did realize that I most often cry due to things that are touching. That just happens spontaneously. People in my daily life know me as a person of passion and have come to realize that I live outside the box, so they never know what to expect. The cool thing was watching some of them follow suit and finding it beneficial. Some of them were probably pent up since childhood. Anyhow, thanks again. RM
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