09-17-2018, 06:58 AM
I have written about this in the benzo withdrawal thread recently too. I started getting full on tonic-clonic seizures when I was about 16. They put me on clonazepam initially to prevent further seizures due to its potent (and lesser well known) anti convulsant effects.
ECG indicates I have a strange electrical pattern emanating from my left parietal lobe. Neurologists don't know what it is as they had never seen that pattern before and it is not a typical epileptiform pattern. They initially thought the electrode was attached wrong but got the same result after a repeat. MRI shows a small subarachnoid cyst- most likely nothing to do with seizures.
In total I have had about 10-15 unprovoked seizures, some while medicated, some while not. I have had 2 seizures directly related to withdrawal from benzos. They peaked around the age of 23 when I was at law school- lack of sleep, overdoing the stimulants, the usual student stuff.
Haven't had one in a couple of years now that I have been relatively stable, working at a flexible and understanding company. They let me take paid breaks to go to the pharmacy, doctors appts etc. Finally getting my licence at the age of 26 was the icing on the cake for me.
Currently on levetiracetam (keppra) 1000mg twice daily and topamax 50mg twice daily. Last year I thought I could just taper off my dose of keppra- didn't tell my doctor or anything. Mostly because anticonvulsant drugs tend to flatten my moods a lot (not bipolar though). Earlier this year came to my senses and decided to go back on it. It was the worst month of my life with the side effects. First time I went on it I was in lala-land from the clonazepam. This time around I was tired, agitated, hot and cold, sweaty, angry, would start crying for no reason. The works. Woke up one day after about 6 weeks and felt completely normal again.
Once I fully accepted this is a condition that requires lifetime management I have lost all shame. I go into all the gory details telling the first aiders at my work where I keep my rectal diazepam injector and how to use it. My work bestie also knows I keep a blanket in my drawer in case of any incontinence.
ECG indicates I have a strange electrical pattern emanating from my left parietal lobe. Neurologists don't know what it is as they had never seen that pattern before and it is not a typical epileptiform pattern. They initially thought the electrode was attached wrong but got the same result after a repeat. MRI shows a small subarachnoid cyst- most likely nothing to do with seizures.
In total I have had about 10-15 unprovoked seizures, some while medicated, some while not. I have had 2 seizures directly related to withdrawal from benzos. They peaked around the age of 23 when I was at law school- lack of sleep, overdoing the stimulants, the usual student stuff.
Haven't had one in a couple of years now that I have been relatively stable, working at a flexible and understanding company. They let me take paid breaks to go to the pharmacy, doctors appts etc. Finally getting my licence at the age of 26 was the icing on the cake for me.
Currently on levetiracetam (keppra) 1000mg twice daily and topamax 50mg twice daily. Last year I thought I could just taper off my dose of keppra- didn't tell my doctor or anything. Mostly because anticonvulsant drugs tend to flatten my moods a lot (not bipolar though). Earlier this year came to my senses and decided to go back on it. It was the worst month of my life with the side effects. First time I went on it I was in lala-land from the clonazepam. This time around I was tired, agitated, hot and cold, sweaty, angry, would start crying for no reason. The works. Woke up one day after about 6 weeks and felt completely normal again.
Once I fully accepted this is a condition that requires lifetime management I have lost all shame. I go into all the gory details telling the first aiders at my work where I keep my rectal diazepam injector and how to use it. My work bestie also knows I keep a blanket in my drawer in case of any incontinence.