F2F with physician coming up, any suggestions?

[solarpunch]

I am having to consider going to a separate doctor for my anxiety issues currently. I feel that my NP can't make any decisions besides my blood pressure management and small amount of pain management. I've tried the whole honest boy scout routine and it seems to have little to no effect with him. Long story short I suffered from severe panic and anxiety attacks 8 years ago. The doctors at that time were like oh you need antidepressants. I kindly said no. I explained I felt like dying. Not wanting to die. That was a huge difference. They sent me to therapy. I worked with a councilor and a psychologist. They came to the conclusion that long term benzo use was best for my situation. I've been on 1 before bed every night for all these years. My doctor at the time agreed that vals were the best option for me since it also was a muscle relaxer. Now that I've been with a NP for the last two years since the doctor moved I started getting the line "this is not a long term solution" BS. Then when the CDC guidelines came out the words taper were thrown around. This last week I was called by the NP's physicians assistant that my NP would only be filling half my script. Saying that according to the new guidelines that it can cause severe respiratory depressions and that I am in danger when taking both pk and benz. I almost had to laugh as it was like he was reading off the CDC script word for word. I then asked him so you've had me in danger this whole time I've seen him? They were caught off guard about that question. I left it as I'd see him at my next appointment to discuss this and the NP was not the person I needed to explain this to. I honestly think the PA has never even read my chart completely to know I went to therapy for a year for my course of treatment. Anyways I plan on discussing this at my next appointment and hope for the best. I most likely though will be looking for a new REAL doctor and not a PA. I have private insurance through my work and figure my chances are better suited at another practice. I plan on informing him that I plan on keeping him for my blood pressure issues but since he can't properly treat me the patient/customer. That I'll need to be referred to someone who can. Not something I want to do but feel I have to do. Doctors forget sometimes that we are there customer/patients and after so many years and different medications you know what works best for your body. So yes you should alway be honest though your patient bill of rights (yes that does exist) says if your doctor can't treat you effectively they need to refer you to someone who can.