Irish Bingo?

[IceWizard]

A young girl from Donegal leaves home to find work in the bright lights of London.

She comes home 6 months later and steps
out of a taxi wearing a full-length mink coat.

'Begorrah, Colleen,' says her mother. 'Tis a lovely soft coat yer wearin' an' it looks so expensive. Where did ye get that?'

Colleen replies, 'Sure now, I won it at the bingo. Don't they have wonderful prizes in London?'
When the weekend's over, Colleen returns to the bright lights, but she's back to visit her mum a few months later. This time, when she steps out of the taxi, she's wearing a beautiful gold wristwatch and a large diamond ring.

Same exchange with Mum...same 'Won it at bingo!' Colleen returns to the bright lights again. A few months later, she's back. This time she's sporting a beautiful emerald and diamond necklace with matching bracelet and earrings.

She hands her mother £1,000 and explains that she won it all in bingo. Then she asks Mum to run her a bath as she needs to freshen up.

When Colleen gets to the bathroom, there's only a quarter inch of hot water in the bath. Colleen, a wee bit peeved at her Mum being so cheap with the hot water after being handed £1,000, calls downstairs

'Mum! sure now, didn't I ask you to run me a bath? There's only a quarter inch of water in the tub!'

'Indeed there is, me darlin,' replies her Mum. 'But we don't want ye gettin' yer bingo card wet now, do we?'


You can never fool Mum.

[Charon]

thank u. some r too risque for me to share with my good sister. uber christian thing.

but, she visits nursing homes all the times. she enjoyed a few u did post. she shared with patients her church visited with.

so, keep em coming. i have eddie izzard memorized, as does my son. dunno. we love him. and absolutely fabulous.

british comedy.

but, i do not tell jokes. so, i appreciate ur sense of humor. (i used to do very elaborate practical jokes on my older sister whom used to be a top doctor. very. based on monty python and spam, spam, spam, wonderful spam, i filled her suitcase with hidden spam cans. before the bad guys did things on airplanes. when she got to her medical conference she found it hysterical. we irish r awfully darn weird. nice, but we have our own stubborn ways.)

[Allegory]

I always enjoy a good Irish joke, I get to imagine my great-grandfather telling it.

Such a warm memory.

Recently I have found the standup comedian Danny Bhoy.

He's a Scot, but he's got the humour worthy of an Irishman. That accent brings me so much peace.

I only wish my parents had not wasted the opportunity to secure dual citizenship.