Humorous Smilies

[Linville]

Oh My GOSH, IceWizard very funny indeed.

expires in 3 years, had me.......

[IceWizard]

The Jewish Dentist

In 1936, Morris Rabinowitz, a dentist, fled his native Germany.

He sold his assets and made five sets of solid gold teeth with his cash,well above the limit he could bring into the U.S.

When he arrived in New York, the customs official was perplexed as to why anybody would have five sets of gold teeth.

So Morris explained.

"Jews who keep kosher have two separate sets of dishes for meat products and dairy products, but I am so religious I also have separate sets of teeth."

The customs official shook his head and said, "Well, that accounts for two sets of teeth. What about the other three?"

Morris replied, "Very religious Jews use separate dishes for Passover, but I am so Orthodox that I have separate teeth for Passover meat and Passover dairy food."

The customs official shook his head and said, "You must be a man of very strong faith to have separate teeth for meat and dairy products and likewise for Passover. That accounts for four sets of teeth. What about the fifth set?"

Morris looked around and spoke softly. "To tell you the truth," he said, "once in a while I like a ham sandwich".



Opinions?





Just so y'all will know....





Oh ... BtW

[Linville]

Very funny IceWizard.

******

Ran across this again and it just struck me very funny....

Warning "Potty Mouth"  at times....

Title, "Substitute Teacher"

******

[dbody]

how come ya

[Charon]

   







                                                                                         

[Linville]

Charon the John Wayne saying is one of my favorites.

Good find in a captioned picture.

Thanks for posting it.

[IceWizard]

My New Morning Prayer



Am I a Bad Mom?



Finally... Something that works and it afforable!!

[Linville]

Ice, 3 top funnies in one post,   which one is the best, well dead heat. Oh so good, they are.  

[Popster]

these are dedicated to Ice:

The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can be in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.

My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I’m pretty sure she was hitting on me.

My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I’m worried about the 175 pounds I've gained since then.

I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"

Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us." If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!

If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple "Thank you" is all I need ... not all this, "How did you get into my house?" business!

The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s going to get me something.

On average, an American man will have sex two to three times a week. Whereas, a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. This is very upsetting news to me. I had no idea I was Japanese.

I can't understand why women are okay that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."

I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.

Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!

The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.

Joy of getting older:  If I do something stupid, I won't remember long enough to stay embarrassed

[Tbaronfl]

Had a good belly laugh. Thanks Popster!